Let's All Go to the Lobby!

Last night I watched "Hellboy II: The Golden Army."  I wish I could be more excited about it, but for some reason I just am not.  There were tons of of great visuals: finely detailed costumes, crisp special effects, and nearly lifelike computer animations.  The problem isn't really with the plot, either, the idea of an indestructible, unrelenting army unleashed on the world with no one to oppose it.  My biggest problem with the movie is the sluggish pace it follows: periods of wordy moodiness and mopey exposition.  Just get to the monster smashing already!  The romance between Hellboy and Liz is still smoldering, but it rubs more as a cliche than anything else, which is thoroughly disappointing.  Add in the tacked on baby plot device, and it's a regular summer romantic comedy.  Many of the performances are very stilted.  I would have rather have watched cardboard cutouts instead of the Prince and Princess who eat up so much of the screen time.  As much as I have enjoyed Jeffrey Tambor (especially in Arrested Development, RIP) he seems to be sorely out of place in this film, which is exactly the opposite of how I felt of his character in the first film.  He, almost more than anyone else, seems ill fitted to his surroundings and unsure of how to act around all of the fantastic creatures he works with at the BPRD.  Hellboy will probably still be a major box office draw and may possibly squirt out another sequel (which I probably will see), but I just wish it was a stronger, tighter movie.

The only thing that salvaged the movie for me is the glorious knowledge that in five sweet days I will be seeing "The Dark Knight" and that's all that matters.